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Free To Be Me

Sheila Walsh writes in her book “Loved Back to Life: How I Found the Courage to Live Free” “…at times a fear of connection drives us away from one another. We are afraid to be known because we might be rejected. We are afraid to be known because at some deep level we fear that truth about us, when out in the open and reflected back to us through someone else’s eyes, will be shocking to ourselves.” She then writes, “So we struggle with this human dichotomy; we long to be known because we are lonely, and we fear being known because we may then be loneliest of all.”

This truth really resonated with me as I took hold of what Sheila was saying. It’s so true. We may smile and say everything is okay, when in reality, we feel like we’re falling apart. It’s the mask that goes on in our jobs and in our families and even at church. We keep everyone at just enough distance so they won’t really see us. It’s a tiring job. I say that from experience. Sometimes I just want to shout, “I’m not alright!” “I’m hurting!” But I don’t…and you don’t. Instead we carry our anxious thoughts like a big, heavy bone buried in the depths of our hearts.

I always say, "There are some places only Jesus can go with you." It’s a very dark place to be as we isolate ourselves, never wanting to let anyone know anything is going on.

In those times I must remind myself that with Jesus there is no darkness. “This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all.” 1John 1:5 Jesus knows us as we are. He knows our pain, He knows our suffering and affliction. He knows our sin and our failures. He longs to heal us. He came to set us free. “So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.” John 8:36 In fact the scriptures tell us we ARE free!

Why then do we wrap ourselves in a cocoon when we could be spreading our wings and flying like the beautiful but